the bad social media friend.

A few weeks ago, one of my very best friends came to visit me. I started teasing her about how she rarely likes my Instagram posts unless I ask her. She then said, “You never like my stuff, either.”

The next day, I was eating dinner with another friend, and we were discussing the fact that my roommate had just got engaged. My friend asked if I had seen my roommate’s Instagram post. That’s when I realized I wasn’t even following my roommate on Instagram. I also don’t have her as a Facebook friend.

Let me explain.

About two years ago, I was having a really tough time. One morning, I was scrolling through Instagram and had the thought that I honestly didn’t care about these people’s lives. I was only seeing the “highlights” of each person’s day, and assumed I knew everything I needed to know about a person by what he or she posted.

I also assumed these people’s lives were much better than mine because I didn’t have anything special in my life to post on social media about. 

On a whim, I decided to delete the Instagram app from my phone, and I honestly don’t miss it.

Every few months or so, I’ll download the app and post something. Or I’ll see what some of my long-distant friends are doing with their lives. But then I usually logout and delete the app again for another few months.

I get on Twitter and Facebook every day, but out of the 84 people I follow on Twitter, 28 of them are “muted” (meaning I can’t see their posts unless I actually intend to). On Facebook, I have hidden several people’s posts from my news feed, including my own mother’s.

So yes, I am a bad social media friend. I just really don’t care, but I do have reason.

If someone really wants me to see a picture, he or she can send it to me via text.

If someone really wants me to know about a special thing happening in his or her life, that person can call me or tell me face-to-face.

I someone really wants to me to know about the awesome things going on each day, that’s cool. But I would really love to talk with you about the not-so-awesome things going on, because everyone needs to vent sometime.

If someone really wants me to pray for him or her, I will. But I would also really love to pray with you.

No matter how hard I try, I cannot really form a friendship with someone over what they post on social media, but I sometimes feel like there’s no need to talk to you or to ask about your life if I’ve already seen your Facebook status.

Sure, that might be wrong of me, but I really want to truly care about your life.